Laundry, Antidote for Anxiety

Sometimes I think that there must be a clue to the purpose of my life in the lint trap of the dryer. I find myself there, scraping it out, more often than I would expect. I like laundry though; it gives me a sense of efficiency and productivity. It stands in defense of me when I can't seem to keep up on anything else in my life. Haven't sent the grandparents pictures of the grandkids in six months? Hey, there must be some laundry I need to do. Need to make doctor and dentist appointments for the girls, do some Christmas shopping, make half a dozen phone calls in which I will be on hold for an hour, write my Christmas letter? Ella, Lilly, why don't we change your clothes so that I will have a load of laundry to start on?
Speaking of laundry, I have an acquaintance in New Haven who is a Laundry Diva. She folds things in such a way that she never has to do a touch of ironing. I guess her timing must be perfect as well, to get the clothes to just the right point of dryness, but not so hot and dry that the wrinkles are already locked in. I am thinking that perfectionism in this area could really pay off. A scholar friend we knew, who was living bachelor-style for the summer while doing research, swore by the virtues of the slightly damp load of laundry. He said that they dried in the drawers and came out crisper. I really ought to try that...

Bliss Cake

I am calling this blog Bliss Cake because that's what my life is: it's like eating the perfect cake, a bliss cake in fact. It's delicious, it's beautiful, and it's got lots of frosting! Why was I given so much? It's absurd and mysterious. God is good under every circumstance. He has been unbelievably gracious to me. This life thing can be so hard for people. I am deeply saddened to see them struggling, and I am convicted by the fact that I grow "soft" as I am comfortable. God have mercy on me, a sinner.
I want to do something. I want to help those in great need, but feel ill-equipped to do so. However I heard Professor John Hare of Yale Divinity School give a message to my congregation in New Haven, CT. He talked about the principle of "providential proximity" wherein God places you where you can help those around you. Most especially we ought to be concerned with our neighbors, not only those in far away lands but those whose hurt and brokenness is right next door to us.
May God enable me to give from the innumerable riches of love and joy and peace that He has given to me. May those who enter my home feel welcomed and appreciated.

Fall Time!

My toddler, Ella, was asking me why the leaves were changing the other day. We talked about chlorophyll and the nature of seasons, how everything goes to sleep for winter and begins fresh in the spring. And it occurred to me, and I told her, that watching the seasons change is one of the many exciting aspects of life. We can watch the progress (dare I say miracle?) of birth, growth, life, fruition and expiration right in front of our eyes. What wonder, what happy circumstance, that we should witness the flourishing and unfurling of creation year in, year out. And what a marvel that every season should have its peculiar charms. October is resplendent with apples and pumpkins and the onset of reds, oranges and yellows. And then consider with me the bright chill of a November morning, seasoned with the musk of the final leaves on the ground. In the autumn mornings we can sense the frost getting a bit more serious and see it getting thicker, and watch our breath coming in giant dragon clouds out of our mouths. Each evening we can see the darkness lapping up into the afternoon, minute by minute, like an incoming tide.
Oh the magic!
And then, winter comes.....

Romance of Life

I was talking to my friend Rebecca yesterday. We were revisiting an old topic of ours, learning how to do the mundane little tinkerings of life with cheer. It's true that she and I both do not work outside of the home, and we both enjoy the vocation of cooking, cleaning, decorating, and offering hospitality in the space we've been given to do so. We both contend that it adds a certain warmth and welcome to the life of "home", however humble. But there is a certain regularity to the jobs we perform, a certain amount of schlepping, of following well worn paths to the washing machine, the grocery store, the refrigerator, the coffee pot. I suppose it's no different in some ways from the woman who works full-time outside the home and keeps the foundations of her home intact; but it's less out of necessity that we do these things, and more out of a desire to nourish the souls of the ones we love. I want to create an environment where life sparkles around the edges. But when Thursday turns into Friday so suddenly and I do it all again, it can become something lifeless indeed.
The oddity of this is, that if I had a terminal illness or lost my family somehow or was suddenly booted out of my home, it would be apparent to me that working at all these small putterings is a privelege. I would recognize the romance of the mundane, the beauty of doing life and its tasks over and over again. It is a good indeed - to embrace the act of living even in its trivialities, and thank God for another day of breath.

Tragedy and Consequences

Don't get me wrong. I am loath to create a blog for my rantings. That's not what I hope to use this blog for, but rather as a place for ideas and thanks-giving. That said, here is an idea with some small ranting. Kindness is crucial to the relative peace that we enjoy in this particular country. Kindness to the point of sacrifice, I think. I am struck by this idea. Witness recent events with public/private schools, a supposed safe place for kids. What are we to make of the recent shootings? Who are these people? And how do they justify taking the lives of children as a remedy for their bitterness? I know God is merciful. I confess with no pleasure that I hate people who enact such violence. I want to see their lives ended, and painfully. But this is not God's idea of goodness. He wants to see restoration. He wants us to love our neighbors and even our enemies, those who don't just disturb our lives but ruin them.
This is hard to take. Even for me, utterly outside of the drama that has ripped through these families and communities. But God requires of us a "giving over" of ourselves, our lives, our dearest treasures. He wants His transforming Love to be the rock that we cling to, even while being brutally battered by life's tragedy. Like little barnacles, hanging on for dear life. But this not because He wants us to suffer. He wants to provide. He wants to meet our every need in surprising, overwhelming ways. He wants to love us more than we imagined we could be loved.
Still the pits of life are dark and dank and putrid. But when our hearts fill our chests as we witness some moment of sparkling beauty that seems to be an unnatural side-step from the commotion in our lives, we are reminded that Hope lives - in spite of, and in victorious response to, the darkness.

Le Joie De Vie

I have a pretty special life. I'm not boasting. I want to say how thankful I am. I live in a charming garden apartment with three delightful roommates: my husband and our two daughters, both under three. My husband is working toward his ph.D. at N.U. I get to stay at home with our girls! What luxury! What pleasure!
My daughters and I get to plan our days as whimsy (and indeed sometimes necessity) leads. I have uttered exclamations of disbelief as we strolled to the nearby beach, only to find it empty several warm weekday afternoons. So we played in the sand and in the lake, and felt quite satisfied with ourselves!
We have fun together. Some days it's hard (like anything). Today has been a little hard. Both girls were weepy blobs most of the day so far. They've both just awakened from their naps, rosy cheeked and talkative. I think I'll go and enjoy their company!